Monday, August 29, 2011

MIL drama

OK so I figured I may as well write about the crappy MIL drama from the weekend.

Weeks ago, MIL said that she and FIL would buy us a really nice vacuum cleaner as a housewarming gift. We were really happy about that, as our current one isn't great.

Fast forward to Saturday - hubby got a call from his mom to say that she'd collected the vacuum. She then went on to say that she's been using it in her house and it's really good. When hubby told me that she said it was good, I thought he meant she'd demo'd it in the store, so he had to fill me in. I was like "WTF?! Seriously? Who does that?!"

She'd also told him that her hubby (FIL) was pissed with her for using it, since it's supposed to be a gift for us.

Anyway, we went there for dinner the same day, as planned, and the vacuum cleaner was sitting out in full view, unboxed of course. She didn't mention it so I didn't say anything. Inside I was seething, though. My FIL made a few comments that night about how he was pissed about it, saying that it's not hers to use and she shouldn't be using it at all. I fully agree!

When it was time to leave I went to the bathroom and I could vaguely hear a conversation between hubby and his parents. I got the general gist of the conversation, but I asked hubby to fill me in on the way home. He said that his mom said, "You don't need to take the vacuum today, you can get it in a week when you move in to your new house" - so hubby said "Why, are you going to keep on using it?" and she was like "Yeah!"
Hubby and FIL proceeded to tell her that she's out of order and you just don't do that when you buy a gift for someone - it's the principle of it! She didn't listen to either of them and just tried to justify it.

Now in my mind, since it's meant to be a gift from both MIL and FIL, she should respect FIL's views on the subject even if she doesn't respect our views. I didn't say a word about the damn thing, because I was so angry about it. She's proving herself to be a boundary-stomping bitch, if you ask me. It might "only" be a vacuum cleaner, but it's not the first time she's fucked something up for us. When we got married, she told us she didn't like the items on our registry (she even called some of them "tacky") and then went out and bought completely different items that she chose, because she liked them. Well, she had no respect for us because we'd spent time choosing items we liked and she chose for us instead. Also, I then had to delete the stuff we'd chosen because otherwise we could've ended up with 2 sets of everything. It wasn't the end of the world, we ended up with patterned plates instead of the plain ones we wanted, but I think it was a sign of things to come. Now the whole, "Here, I've bought this expensive vacuum cleaner for you, I know you can't afford to buy one like this yourselves, but before you get it I'm going to use it for 10 days or so" thing is taking the piss.

I feel as though she's trying to mark her territory or something. I honestly don't think she's accepted the fact that her "little boy" is married now, he's going to be 30 in 2 months, and he's got his own life. She knows I'm the only person who will be using that vacuum cleaner, because I'm a housewife. She knows it's pissing her husband off, and her son. She probably knows she's pissed me off too, because I couldn't act "normal" around her on Saturday because of all this bullshit. Also I think if she thought I was fine with it, she would've tried to get me to back her up because her own husband and mine were both telling her she was in the wrong. She's lucky she didn't do that, because I would've told her what I think about it. It's never crossed my mind that anyone would even think to use something they'd bought as a gift for someone!

Back to the wedding registry thing, I know nobody is obliged to buy gifts from the registry, but it really annoyed me because when you buy a gift for someone it should be something you think they will like - it's not about you, it's about them. I've bought gifts for people because I knew it was what they wanted - the only consideration I had to make was if I could afford it or not! She actually ended up spending more money than she would've if she'd bought the stuff on our registry, which is her prerogative, but it's not the point is it? It's obviously all about her, as she's proved yet again.

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