I'm 12 dpo today and while my chart still looks good, I started spotting this morning. Needless to say, I'm not very optimistic. I usually start spotting at 11-12 dpo, and my LP is 13 days. I guess I'll be getting my period on Tuesday, then.
The longer this journey goes on, the worse it gets. I started out being super optimistic, certain that we'd probably conceive within 6 months or so. That time has been and gone. I no longer get my hopes up very much, but when it becomes apparent that we haven't been successful it hurts more every time. My expectations are a lot lower than they used to be, but the pain is a lot worse. I used to be able to shrug it off fairly easily; after all, we hadn't been trying very long. I know that compared to some people, we still haven't been trying very long - I don't mean to be insensitive to anybody who might be struggling more than we are. It's coming up a year since we started trying, though, and we still have nothing to show for it. I just didn't think it was going to be this difficult.