Tuesday, May 15, 2012

My hubby

Last night while we were eating dinner, my hubby apologized to me. Why? Because he didn't do anything for Mother's Day (from our pugs). I know it sounds ridiculous, but last year he got me a little gift from them and I was a little bummed this year when he didn't do anything. OK, now I've written it down it sounds crazy. Anyway, he said that he "didn't want to remind me of what we don't have". I almost cried because there's no way I can forget what we don't have. I wish I could, believe me. Anyway, I thought it was sweet of him to think about it so much. I just figured he thought it was a silly thing to do, since the dogs are dogs and not our kids. I didn't really consider that he was worried about hurting me. I guess he's deeper than I give him credit for!

He also asked me to go with him to his doctor appointment tomorrow. He's worried he'd omit important info about what we've been doing as far as TTC is concerned. He probably would, in all honesty. He's not the one who's been charting and temping etc. He wouldn't have a clue about how long my cycles are or what day I ovulate on. I mean, I tell him that stuff but I doubt that he retains that information. He's a guy, after all. So I'm glad he wants me to be there - I guess we should be doing this together anyway.

I'm all too aware that 90% of couples conceive within a year of having regular unprotected sex, and that number only increases to 95% within 4 years. It's not very encouraging when we're virtually at the one year mark now, but statistics aren't everything. Maybe those women who conceive within 12 months have perfect 28 day cycles - I sure as hell don't. Maybe they're thin - I'm definitely not. This is why I'm not sure when to get myself checked out: should I wait until I've had 12 cycles? Or is a year of having fairly long cycles (34 days on average) enough? I guess we'll see what happens when my hubby gets tested and go from there. I have this niggling suspicion that if anything is "wrong" with either of us, it'll be me and not him. I don't know why, I just do.

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